Each of these writings came about for its own reasons, collectively they are musings linked by my fascination with fate, choice, chance, faith, forgiveness, forgetting, freedom of expression, appeasement through prayers, adherence to rituals, trolling for miracles, pursuit of happiness... (Amy Tan - The Other Side of Faith)
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
what do you see?
The day after tomorrow - we are officially bidding the Year of 2008 farewell - I am wondering - what's in store for me in the year to come? Whatever it is, I am sure it will be a challenging year, a great year!!!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
sweet is the taste of revenge...
'Tis more noble to forgive, and more manly to despise, than to revenge an injury. - Benjamin Franklin
i had been having this controversial thought in my mind for the last 2 years. should i rejoice when i see a fella who had hurt me and caused me much injustice one day suffer? i could have taken revenge easily, but i chose not to... cause i have always believed that 天有眼... and therefore, i left it to the One to take avenge for me. well, the world would say it's only fair we repay kindness with kindness, cruelty with cruelty. yeah, an eye for an eye - will make the world goes blind.
well... living a super luxurious life, going for holidays half way round the globe and all - are all mere superficial stuffs as i had guessed. thankfully, this person is my history. and because i know him so well, i know somehow, he will fall. not because he is a failure, but because he has failed to see beyond his own hypocrisy and pretentious lifestyle.
tell me - what good is it if you live an empty life? when your mortgages are overdue and banks are calling you every other day? when your car has been towed by the bank? when you are blacklisted by all banks? when you have lost the one you loved, for the one you lusted? when you have caused grief and sadness in your family? when you have lost the respect from your younger siblings? trade all these with a life filled with alcohol, women, travel and gambling??? how silly...
i m not a very noble person. now at this point, all i can say is that the taste of revenge is not sweet. it's just a comfort and encouragement to know i have not 'suffered' in vain, and that there's still 天理, justice. 人善天不欺, 簡單一個道理。
i do hope still, one day, he'd come to his senses and change his way...before he loses everything, including his family, his friend, or even his life.
Monday, December 15, 2008
i have got the answer to my last post
yes, it's a green light - which means 'GO'. cool :)
slowly and steadily but surely. i don't have to run very fast, it's not a race, i could do it at my own pace. i can still take time to stop and smell the flowers yet i will still soar and reach for the stars.
"Flowers do not force their way with great strife. Flowers open to perfection slowly in the sun."
你說的對, 最難過的2年,我都撐得住 - 區區幾個月又有什么問題呢?
Friday, December 5, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
life is like this...
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
手放開 letting go
Thursday, November 6, 2008
婚姻如一碗水 it's like a bowl of water
Friday, October 24, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Facebook residents - Your chance to do good!
Friday, October 17, 2008
十字路口的心理测验
B.往北走
C.往西走
D.往东走
做事态度上,你是做事稳重、事业心较强的人。遇挫折会有放弃念头,但从事喜欢的工作则不会,算是有始有终的成功者。因此找出你的兴趣,做你爱做的工作很重要。
做人态度:在人际交往上,能取得平衡,因此颇有人缘。待人和善,可公正处理人事纠纷,不得罪任何一方。缺乏热情,因此在恋爱时,常处被动的地位,易错失良缘。
做事态度上,你容易受挫折,常有挫折感,很难找到自己满意的工作。你需要很多助手帮你完成工作,依赖性较重。有太多期望,对自己的能力表现要求较高,使自己变得更加胆怯。对新的事物,常常犹豫不定是否要尝试。
做人态度:觉得自己不受欢迎,因此个性软弱,需贴心的朋友肯定自己的决定。不易交到朋友,因为你常躲避人群,认为多数人都不友善,因此能交到的知心朋友也不多。
B.往北走
做事态度上,你是苦干型人物,也有相当好的领导能力。你不会轻易插手干涉或处理别人的事。因此不轻易向人求助,也不善于体谅别人的需要,常是孤独的工作者。
做人态度上,你总是经过衡量之后,才选择和谁做朋友。常将所有的感情都经过理性的分析,因此你的朋友多半是因互相需要而在一起。如果配不上你的朋友,常常因得不到你的友情而终将离你而去。
C.往西走
做事态度上,你极富责任感,但是必须在别人要求或监视之下才肯做好,能顺从别人是你做事的一大特色,并不十分坚持己见。对于个人兴趣和选择工作亦是如此。工作的选择深受身边人的影响很大,能否成功与身边的人有很大的关系。
做人态度:待人非常热忱,重视朋友,但有时太过热情,反而弄巧成拙。因为不懂区分朋友,错将人人都当成好朋友,有过度热情的倾向。在人际关系上,因领悟力差而内心常感寂寞空虚。
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
happy birthday to me!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
yummy evening that ended with rashes scare
last evening was great, finally get to meet up with a super good friend... havent seen her for at least half a year. food was nothing to shout about, the raspberry choc latte kept me awake...no, it made me crave for more :)
as we were sitting there, chatting and catching up... she noticed that there are rashes on my hands. it's kinda itchy, something like 风模. i didn't know what caused the rashes, hope it's not the drink coz i do plan to go and get another one to satisfy my craving. probably it's the food. coz another friend who was there with us commented that she sometimes get allergic reactions, after taking vegetarian food. well, i m not sure, coz this is not the first time i ate vegetarian food, and i have been to this place before, albeit quite a few years back.
after saying our bye byes, i decided to pop by the panel clinic on the way home. i dont want the rashes to flare up the next day. i had one bad experience with rashes, that forced me to take MC and stay home for 3 days, as the rashes will resurface when i m in air-conditioned and super cool room like the office. and it's not just the arms and legs, or the body, it even decided to pay a visit to my face. i dont want to risk looking like a monkey again, lol.
the doc gave me a jab, a bottle of calamine lotion with antibiotics and some anti-itch tablets... and i went home happily, still thinking abt the yummy raspberry choc latte. :)
thank goodness, my skin is clear now (touch wood!) ...
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Lousy Cupid
isn't that how we feel sometimes? what's cupid doing? or rather what's cupid doing wrong?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
is it love? or is it a just an assumption?
Monday, September 22, 2008
原来大白兔唔係我想象中咁好。。。
新闻报道: 国际权威检测机构:大白兔奶糖不含甲醛。 係真唔係啊?不过呢排,中国有毒牛奶事件实在太惊人啦。。。
大马政府亦都宣布了禁令。
算啦,唔吃都吃了咁多年咯。。。唯有从今日起,唔再吃大白兔奶糖。 等等,雪柜好似仲有半包。
white rabbit milk candy - one of the few candies snack that i take had just been declared as one of the confectionery products banned by the Malaysian government. i shudder to think (and dare not imagine) that i have been taking (and enjoying!) melamine all these years... and as of now, i still have half a pack of these candies in my fridge. :(
Thursday, September 18, 2008
my late dad was a taxi driver, too!
The ads promoting "Malaysia: Truly Asia" aim to welcome visitors with a warm smile to a prosperous and modern nation, so the taxi fleet branded "the worst in the world" can come as a bit of a shock.
Even the locals are not spared the shabby service of unkempt and hostile drivers behind the wheels of decrepit vehicles who refuse to use the meter, overcharge and pick-and-choose which destinations they will travel to.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
i see green
go check it out at http://www.canongoesgreen.com/ - nice jingle as you browse through. can a person makes a difference? can a simple gesture makes a greener world? yes and yes!
here's what you can do:
1. They need 300 volunteers to help them plant 2,500 tree saplings.
2. If you can't make it for the tree planting - just submit a photo. You won't even need to leave your desk, or take your eyes off the PC/laptop screen.
Just do it, will ya...
Monday, September 15, 2008
accidental love
GEORGE TOWN: Unlike many couples who met under normal circumstances, Eddie Yeoh, 33, and Eunice Tan, 26, literally collided with each other in a road accident two years ago.
Yeoh’s car rammed into the back of Eunice’s car at Gambir Heights near their work place here on that day in 2006.
He said they were working in the same company but did not really know each other until the accident.
“Fortunately no one was injured in the incident. Everything is fated. Since her car had to be sent for repairs after the accident, I had to fetch her to work every day and that’s how our story started,” he said.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
how i wish i wake up to this every morning...
Thursday, September 11, 2008
天使也会醉吗?
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
the extremes of life ... or is that the norm?
a friend told me a good news - he finally found someone new. i was truly happy for him, coz i think he is a great guy. and he has been single for quite some time now.
a day in the hospital
took a day off work yesterday ... to read on a hospital bed.
in fact i took a nap, watched the TV & had my breakfast, lunch, tea break & dinner on there as well. i was in the hospital from 6am to 7pm... fortunately, i didnt have to spend the night.
i was actually waiting for my mother - who was admitted as a day-care patient in the ophtamalogy ward of HKL. she had her cataract surgery. she's fine now, and resting at home.
mum, moments before she's being brought to the operating theatre
the furthest i could go with her - no stepping beyond the red line!
people who knew about me taking a day off to accompany my mum yesterday had the following remarks:
"wow, such a good daughter." "that's so filial of you." etc etc
my response: not really. as i looked at my mum's frail silhoutte (she seems to have lost lots of weight over the years) and her sometimes helplessness (helpless does not equal to hopeless or useless, ok?) - i felt bad & a tinge of guilt overwhelmed me. i realised i had not been a good daughter after all, as some would have assumed. tho' i wasnt the naughtiest kid on the block, i did made her angry & had to beat me up countless times when i was young. in her words yesterday - 打你都是因为要教你 (to beat you is to teach you). mum was a firm believer of sparing the rod, spoiling the child.
even in my adult life, i have caused her lots of heartaches... & i don't know how many more times i broke her heart. i wish... i could make it up to her someway, somehow, someday.
just taking a day off work, and spending it with her is nothing - compared to the sacrifices she had made and how she had taken care of me when i was young. she may have more than 1 child, but i only have 1 mother. there were & are & will still be times when we cant see eye to eye - but at least, we can feel heart to heart.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts
Introverts tend to be those who are more energized when alone with themselves. They are the ones who have to be dragged to parties, who are the first ones ready to leave after a short period of time, and who generally enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming. (yes - this is basically how i am)
The reason why the majority of people think that there’s something wrong with introverts is because the majority of people aren’t very knowledgeable when it comes to introverts, in terms of why they are the way they are and why they do the things they do.
My hope is this article will help solve that problem by shedding some light as to why introverts are the way they are and do the things they do, so here are 5 things every extrovert should know about introverts.
1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social.
This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts.
Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right?
Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking.
There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that.
The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.
Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that.
You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise.
2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk.
If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met. (oooh, perfect description!)
This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant.
Why?
Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case.
It’s just a matter of preference.
Extroverts thrive on small talk.Introverts abhor it.
There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference.
This brings us to the third point.
Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc.
And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point.
4. Introverts need time alone to recharge. (yes, i am one who needs lots of me-time)
Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.
They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries.
5. Introverts are socially well adjusted.
Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t choose to socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people.
It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival.
But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation.
Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place.
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Saturday, September 6, 2008
it's 6 sept...
5 years ago on this day... i began a journey in life, expecting a fairy tale ending - happily ever after. 有一个时期, 我以为我会永远记得这一天; 没想到现在这一天却变了只是普普通通的一天, 并没什么特别。
it didnt happen. that dream was shattered two years on. finally, my life took a detour last July. looking back sometimes, it still seems like i have been in a dream these 5 years. 梦已经破碎了。。。往后的日子,我只有带着盼望和希望继续好好的活, 寻找自己的幸福。 我会再次得到幸福吗? 我希望会。。。请祝福我。
Friday, September 5, 2008
cluttered mind, cluttered heart, cluttered home
oops, my home is a mess.
(nope, my house is not as dirty as above, it's just messy)
that's what has been happening lately. i m caught up with other things & my home ends up in a big big mess... to the point i cant find the remote control to my DVD player -> that shows i havent watched dvd for quite awhile.
deeper... i think it's a reflection of my state of mind. of late, i seem to be having lots to think about yet i dunno what is it that bothers me. probably i know but unconciously trying to run away. i dunno. i can b quite elusive in that sense... maybe i m just a coward who's scared to face the realities in life. sometimes i think "just let me live in my fantasy"
u say i could have cleaned it up last Merdeka weekend, when i didnt have to work for 3 days. but the pig in me won my time - i managed to hibernate & slept my hoildays away! not the whole time of course, i spent great quality time, with my family & taking my nieces out to 1U.
i think i will go home early tonite & get an early start tomorrow morning. oh, wait... i need to be my mum's personal chaffeur, taking her around town to run her errands before her cataract op next week. sunday...maybe. but i dont want to tire myself out as monday is a working day.
excuses!
ok, i admit it - i m lazy. sigh.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
must show my true colours!
the resulting analysis of me:
You are a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. You need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan you tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.
my analysis on the above analysis - hmmm... pretty accurate. i'd give it a 85. that's pretty high. the 15 point reduction was for this statement - you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord- which i dun agree. i dun think i am a demanding person - i think i m simple & rather cin-cai.... in most circumstances. ha! & i think i m only critical with certain things and/or certain people. otherwise i couldnt care less. if i m critical, i think it's because i care. no? and i don't think i m an extrovert - but i do like to be in control, though. other than that - i pretty agree with what was 'written' about me.
try it for yourself and let me know what you think.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
真心相识为何不能一世相知?
后记: 寻晚所写嘅。。。到依家都有D念念不忘。仲係思考紧寻晚点解有咁嘅冲动写左以上呢篇混乱。 都怪我唔知点样突然被一句话深深地带来一份感触: 不要随便牵手,更不要随便放手。 似付我有D越描越黑。 @-@ (3 Sept 2008, 10.56am)
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
a decision that i will never regret...
when i applied for college back then - i applied to take up a major in Management Accounting. the other close competitor is a major in Financial Accounting. those of you not in the field will just say - what's the big deal? both the majors still have the word "accounting" in there. true, but the similarities end there.
briefly -
Financial Accounting : deals mainly with the reporting of past data - the history
Management Accounting : deals with future, probable-to-happen data - the future
i m so glad i took MA back then. i just feel that i m not cut out to be an accountant. i m better off analysing, writing commentaries, fiddling with possible scenarios, playing with forecasts figures, predicting trends ... those tasks make me more alive.
many people have commented to me, in front of me, by the side of me, behind me --> accountants are boring. well, u cant really blame them - they are dealing with dead, historical data most times. but don't underestimate them - ever heard of creative accounting?
last but not least - i m proud to say that i m a member of the Chartered Institute of Management Accountants (yes, showing off i am just because i can! haha.)
Thursday, August 21, 2008
因为那烟火太灿烂,也因为那烟火有点伤感
可能我只想知道你在想什么, 请贴近我的心, 贴近我的耳朵。
Phuket Fantasy Part 3/3
Day 3 - marked the day we checked out of Karon Princess and moved to Kata Palm Resort. it was love at first sight ... well, almost... the hotel was having some minor renovation work going on. but still, the place was beautiful. impressive lobby. and the room! it's very romantic. we did not have sea-view, but the pool view was great too.
my room mate couldnt wait to jump into the pool, while i couldnt wait to soak in the tub :) while some others just wanted to laze around.
we had some rest & relax time, before proceeding to Phuket Fantasea; phuket island's renowned theme park. a few friends who had been to phuket said this is a must-see. so we forked out slightly less than MYR150 to go, which is inclusive of a show.
the show won a lot of applause. spectacular to say the least. too bad we were not allowed to bring in our cameras... inclusive of our camera handphones. it's a good thing though, otherwise we will be too busy snapping away & did not concentrate on the show.
the show starts at 9pm, but u should go earlier to do some shopping, & explore the other attractions there - the palace of the elephants, festival village, elephant rides; to name a few.
by the time we leave the park we were exhausted & excited. our exhaustion won over and we decided to go back to the hotel. nearing Kata beach, we went for a stroll, jalan-jalan cari makan. our last chance to savour the delicous food, before we leave the next morning.
by the time we were back in our hotel room, i was very tired. just tried to gather my last bit of strength to pack my bags before going to bed.
Day 4 - we had time after breakfast, to go for massage, swim, shopping and whatever we wanted to do before we leave for the airport. i took a stroll along Kata beach. the sea was still pretty rough. the waves were as high as a kid. kinda scary, if u ask me.
i finally managed to buy a pair of sandals. i have always wanted a pair, but nothing caught my fancy. practiced my negotiation skills :) what to do, THB in my pocket was almost depleted.
at the airport, we had a quick lunch at Burger King before boarding our flight home. sad... to leave such a beautiful place. sad... to see our holiday end. sad ... knowing we had to go back to work the next day.
so that's about it. am looking forward to my next holiday. no idea when and where yet. maybe a trip to Yogyakarta to see this?