Sad.

Sad coz... I didn't get to drink one of my fave soup - lotus root with peanuts. More sad coz... I indirectly made my mum felt guilty.

After work today, I had to fetch mum to her doctor's place in Taman Desa. As I didn't have time to have dinner, she packed dinner for me from home. Almost reaching the destination, I commented that the food smells great; I was really hungry at that time. Then only she realised she had spilled the soup; no wonder it smells so good.

She kept saying that because she's old, therefore she's useless, can't even do a simple task right, etc. She felt so guilty that it made me feel even worse. I did not voice out my disapppointment (my fave soup!), just tried to cheer her up.

I know lately many things had been causing her anxiety, my siblings' health, my nephew's health...even though, she had not been feeling well herself. 养儿一百，长优九十九。

...

How do I...

...know that I have really loved someone sincerely & deeply?

A year ago, when I was asked whether I would take him back, I'd surely & without doubt said "No." Today, I still hold the same answer... difference is I hesistated for a second or two. I know I have truly loved him...despite all.

But that was the past.

I had moved on. In the search of someone who could make me love with all my heart & soul again, and loves me the same.

You'll never live until you have loved with all your heart and soul.