Wednesday, September 24, 2008

is it love? or is it a just an assumption?

when you feel that he doesnt care much about you, maybe it's because you cared too much.

有时候,不是对方不在乎你,而是你把对方看得太重要!


sometimes, love is just an assumption.

有些爱只是假设性的。


from the very beginning, you have already assumed that he loved you.

你在一开始的时候已经假设他必定是爱你的。


because of this belief, you have decided to give it your all. just like spring cleaning of the heart, you clear it all to give it to him. all because you believe that he loved you and therefore, he loved all that you are.

正因为这样自我肯定的相信着,你终于在感动之余决定回以相同的感情,可是门一开却忍不住大敞,什么都给了出去像清扫了整个房子,你把拥有的全部一口气都堆积在他面前,为了你相信他爱你的一切就像你爱自己。

do you really know what you like about him? is it just a feeling of comfort? or care? or fear of loneliness? or just to prove that you are no longer alone? do you really know what love is? sometimes, love could just be an assumption, it's just what you assumed it to be.

你当真知道你为什么爱这个他?是一种感觉舒服、还是可以被宠坏;是一种怕寂寞、还是能够炫耀你不孤单?你当真知道什么是爱?有些爱,是种假设性的存在。有时候,是你自以为有爱。

Monday, September 22, 2008

原来大白兔唔係我想象中咁好。。。

年少无知。。。想当年係几咁喜欢大白兔。。。但係,竟然,它其实係对我有害。



新闻报道: 国际权威检测机构:大白兔奶糖不含甲醛。 係真唔係啊?不过呢排,中国有毒牛奶事件实在太惊人啦。。。



大马政府亦都宣布了禁令



算啦,唔吃都吃了咁多年咯。。。唯有从今日起,唔再吃大白兔奶糖。 等等,雪柜好似仲有半包。


white rabbit milk candy - one of the few candies snack that i take had just been declared as one of the confectionery products banned by the Malaysian government. i shudder to think (and dare not imagine) that i have been taking (and enjoying!) melamine all these years... and as of now, i still have half a pack of these candies in my fridge. :(

Thursday, September 18, 2008

my late dad was a taxi driver, too!


Malaysian taxis voted as the worst in the world! not surprising, if you ask me...but definitely disappointing. what a shame!

full story can be found here. just an excerpt of the article:
The ads promoting "Malaysia: Truly Asia" aim to welcome visitors with a warm smile to a prosperous and modern nation, so the taxi fleet branded "the worst in the world" can come as a bit of a shock.
Even the locals are not spared the shabby service of unkempt and hostile drivers behind the wheels of decrepit vehicles who refuse to use the meter, overcharge and pick-and-choose which destinations they will travel to.
wait...
why does this make me sad? first & foremost becoz i m a malaysian. it's terrible and embarrassing to be voted the worst in the world.

above all that, becoz my late dad was a taxi driver himself for over 20 years. every time when i board a taxi - i will chat with the drivers. talking to them somehow makes me feel i m connected to my dad, who left us 7 years ago.

it's tough life being a taxi driver. try driving around all day under the hot scorching sun, getting stuck in jams, having irregular meal times, having to control your about-to-burst bladder. on and on... i still remember there were at least twice when dad came home with his face and shirt stained with blood! yup, we now drive around feeling so paranoid, thinking about those new crime tactics that we just read from our emails or the news. you know, those where potential crimes take place if someone hit your car or knocked on your window. think of the risk and fear that these taxi drivers had to encounter, when they had to take in passengers. to make a living for themselves and their loved ones, they had no choice but to take these passengers. yes, they can reject the suspicious ones, but what if they are genuine and they decide to report to the authorities the cabby who declined their business?

well... i don't deny that there are black sheep amongst the pack. i have met some rather rude or unfriendly taxi drivers before. and there were some who made me wanna jump out the taxi as soon as i got on, coz they look so kidnapperish/robberish. and then there were some who had 'upgraded' their meters to run faster, as if to catch up with the fast-paced lives of these days.

i just plead that before we point our fingers at ALL the taxi drivers, let us also be considerate and put ourselves in their shoes.
together, hand in hand, may the dreams of our Malaysian taxi drivers and all Malaysians come true...

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

i see green

recently discovered a green project by canon - check my photo contributions...






go check it out at http://www.canongoesgreen.com/ - nice jingle as you browse through. can a person makes a difference? can a simple gesture makes a greener world? yes and yes!



here's what you can do:
1. They need 300 volunteers to help them plant 2,500 tree saplings.
2. If you can't make it for the tree planting - just submit a photo. You won't even need to leave your desk, or take your eyes off the PC/laptop screen.
Just do it, will ya...

Monday, September 15, 2008

accidental love


Extract from the article:


GEORGE TOWN: Unlike many couples who met under normal circumstances, Eddie Yeoh, 33, and Eunice Tan, 26, literally collided with each other in a road accident two years ago.

Yeoh’s car rammed into the back of Eunice’s car at Gambir Heights near their work place here on that day in 2006.

He said they were working in the same company but did not really know each other until the accident.

“Fortunately no one was injured in the incident. Everything is fated. Since her car had to be sent for repairs after the accident, I had to fetch her to work every day and that’s how our story started,” he said.

this is a good story of how every cloud is silver-lined. there's always sunshine after a thunderstorm... but perhaps for us to appreciate the sunshine more, we had to go through the thunderstorm first.
about love - is it accidental or is it a coincidence or is it fated to be so?

Saturday, September 13, 2008

how i wish i wake up to this every morning...

beautiful blue skies, big white fluffy clouds

蓝天白云 - 蓝的极致,白的纯洁 - 正! 人生一大快事!




even the nite sky was pretty lately... guess it's due to the mid-autumn festival that the Chinese will be celebrating tomorrow. 明月一闪一闪,挂天边; 思念一丝一丝;连成线。

Thursday, September 11, 2008

天使也会醉吗?



今早上班途中,听到电台播放这首歌。。。却深深的被歌的旋律和歌词所打动。




张敬轩 - 酩酊天使


曲:蔡志浩/ Vincent Chow@Sense


词:林若宁


编曲: Gary Tong


监制: Alvin Leong




长时间给一堆工作压碎


让细水将哀愁也冲去


别要担心我气馁发掘闲来情趣


渐渐地淡化苦水


难忘你我也要生活下来


近况好如常地拼搏进取


一开心可以喝醉


倦了一觉睡


情绪便困进身体里


朋友你悄悄远去化作远方的天使


仍间歇听见你旧名字


翻开这相簿至少哭一次


你笑脸印满相纸


朋友再与你说说笑笑已经不可以


而我要奋斗每日如是


一天的奔波也许不止


活在你路过的小都市


随时间过去固执亦下调


但有点无聊事叫我困扰


初相识跟你拍照


但我黑了面


还记住你说应该笑


朋友你过去去过那个故居都空置


人气店永远满座无异


将一些轻松笑话讲一次


带有你每个影子


难过每一天都走过生命是如此


朋友你悄悄远去化作远方的天使


仍间歇听见你旧名字


翻开这相簿至少哭一次


你笑脸印满相纸


朋友再与你说说笑笑已经不可以


而我要奋斗每日如是


珍惜的呼吸也许休止


活着已是最好的心意

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

the extremes of life ... or is that the norm?


a friend told me a good news - he finally found someone new. i was truly happy for him, coz i think he is a great guy. and he has been single for quite some time now.
barely half an hour later, i was informed by another friend, he just broke up with his girlfriend. i think he's a great guy too & i feel sad for him as well.

life's extremes - just as new love is found, another heart is broken somewhere else. or is that the norms of life?

there's more - when a new life is a born, another may be taken away. just as a teardrop falls, a smile has been carved elsewhere. as we are bidding our farewell, a new friend has been made over there. 有人欢笑,有人愁。


to my two friends above - i sincerely wish them happiness.

a day in the hospital

9 Sept 2008
took a day off work yesterday ... to read on a hospital bed.

in fact i took a nap, watched the TV & had my breakfast, lunch, tea break & dinner on there as well. i was in the hospital from 6am to 7pm... fortunately, i didnt have to spend the night.



i was actually waiting for my mother - who was admitted as a day-care patient in the ophtamalogy ward of HKL. she had her cataract surgery. she's fine now, and resting at home.


mum, moments before she's being brought to the operating theatre

the furthest i could go with her - no stepping beyond the red line!

people who knew about me taking a day off to accompany my mum yesterday had the following remarks:

"wow, such a good daughter." "that's so filial of you." etc etc

my response: not really. as i looked at my mum's frail silhoutte (she seems to have lost lots of weight over the years) and her sometimes helplessness (helpless does not equal to hopeless or useless, ok?) - i felt bad & a tinge of guilt overwhelmed me. i realised i had not been a good daughter after all, as some would have assumed. tho' i wasnt the naughtiest kid on the block, i did made her angry & had to beat me up countless times when i was young. in her words yesterday - 打你都是因为要教你 (to beat you is to teach you). mum was a firm believer of sparing the rod, spoiling the child.

even in my adult life, i have caused her lots of heartaches... & i don't know how many more times i broke her heart. i wish... i could make it up to her someway, somehow, someday.

just taking a day off work, and spending it with her is nothing - compared to the sacrifices she had made and how she had taken care of me when i was young. she may have more than 1 child, but i only have 1 mother. there were & are & will still be times when we cant see eye to eye - but at least, we can feel heart to heart.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts


i read & copied this article from here. reason i m posting it in my blog is to keep it as a point of reference for myself.



___________________________________________

First off, there are those who are reading this who might not know which camp they fall into, the extrovert or the introvert. Chances are, the majority of those reading this will know, but for those who don’t, let’s define those two terms here very broadly.


Extroverts tend to be those who are more energized when around other people. They are the ones who will reach for the cell phone when alone for more than a minute, the ones who love to go out every weekend, the ones who love to chit chat, mingle, and socialize.


Introverts tend to be those who are more energized when alone with themselves. They are the ones who have to be dragged to parties, who are the first ones ready to leave after a short period of time, and who generally enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming. (yes - this is basically how i am)

The qualities and characteristics of introverts are often held in a negative light in today’s world, so it’s only natural that the majority of people seem to think that there’s something wrong with them.


The reason why the majority of people think that there’s something wrong with introverts is because the majority of people aren’t very knowledgeable when it comes to introverts, in terms of why they are the way they are and why they do the things they do.


Many people tend to hold several potentially damaging misconceptions about introverts, but through no fault of their own.


I’ve been on both sides of the extrovert/introvert fence, and I can understand why extroverts tend to view introverts in a negative light, socially speaking, so I thought it would be best to write an article dedicated to helping extroverts understand their often very misunderstood introvert counterparts.


My hope is this article will help solve that problem by shedding some light as to why introverts are the way they are and do the things they do, so here are 5 things every extrovert should know about introverts.


1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social.
This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts.


And you can’t really blame them for having that kind of misconception.


Extroverts tend to have to drag introverts to parties, to convince them to go and sell them on attending social engagements. When introverts politely decline, extroverts automatically assume that something might be wrong so they always ask if everything’s all right (yes - this almost always happens! sigh...) and of course, everything is all right. It’s just a common misunderstanding. When extroverts see a pattern like this developing, they automatically assume that introverts are shy or anti-social as that can be the only logical explanation to them.


What’s more, when extroverts try to engage introverts in small talk, it seems like they hit a brick wall.


Add to that, most extroverts see that introverts tend to be fond of engaging in solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.


Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right?

Wrong.


Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking.


Extroverts on the other hand tend to have more activity in the back of their brain, areas that deal with processing sensory information from the external world, so they tend to search for external stimuli in the form of interacting with other people and the outside world to energize them.



There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that.



The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.



Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that.



You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise.



2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk.
If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met. (oooh, perfect description!)



This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant.



Why?



Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case.



It’s just a matter of preference.



Extroverts thrive on small talk.Introverts abhor it.



There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference.



This brings us to the third point.


3. Introverts do like to socialize – only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.


Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc.

And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point.

4. Introverts need time alone to recharge. (yes, i am one who needs lots of me-time)
Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.


They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries.


5. Introverts are socially well adjusted.
Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t choose to socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people.

This just exacerbates previous misconceptions and gives way to labeling introverts as nerds, geeks, loners, etc.


It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival.


But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation.


Do introverts stay true to who they are and risk social alienation and isolation or do introverts conform and join the extroverted side, pretending to be somebody they’re not just to fit in?


This is precisely why I wrote this article, because if the extroverts can become more educated about introverts, introverts will be able to feel free to stay true to who they are, and that’s a good thing from society’s point of view.

Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place.

There’s nothing wrong with introverts.


In fact, introverts are the leading pioneers of advancements in human civilization. Albert Einstein, Issac Newton, Charles Darwin are a few introverts that come to mind, just to name a few.


And for those of you not interested in science, but pop culture, you’ll be surprised to see a lot of well known names in Hollywood are introverts as well. Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Christian Bale to name a few as well.


And for those interested in sports, Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods come to mind as athletes who are introverts as well.


Introverts have a lot to bring to the table. They have an amazing ability to discover new thoughts, an uncanny ability to focus, to concentrate, to connect the dots, to observe and note things that most people miss, to listen extremely well and are often found having a rich and vivid imagination too. (great!)


The more extroverts become knowledgeable about introverts, the less tension and misunderstanding there will be among the two.


So if you’re an introvert reading this, send a copy of this article to all your extrovert friends so they can get a better idea of what you’re all about.


It’s time to finally clear the air.

________________________________________________


this article surely lifted me up. for those who know me personally, please stop assuming that i m arrogant, snobbish or anti-social ya! :)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

it's 6 sept...

i realised this date which changed my life had become less and less significant. i didnt even realise it's 6 sept today...until a while ago.

5 years ago on this day... i began a journey in life, expecting a fairy tale ending - happily ever after. 有一个时期, 我以为我会永远记得这一天; 没想到现在这一天却变了只是普普通通的一天, 并没什么特别。



it didnt happen. that dream was shattered two years on. finally, my life took a detour last July. looking back sometimes, it still seems like i have been in a dream these 5 years. 梦已经破碎了。。。往后的日子,我只有带着盼望和希望继续好好的活, 寻找自己的幸福。 我会再次得到幸福吗? 我希望会。。。请祝福我。

Friday, September 5, 2008

cluttered mind, cluttered heart, cluttered home

just the other day, a friend decided to drop by at my place ... unannounced!



oops, my home is a mess.


(nope, my house is not as dirty as above, it's just messy)

embarassing! i m resolving to clear the clutter & give the house a spanking clean & tidy look this weekend... if i dont get caught up by other things. i hope i wont be caught with a messy home again!



that's what has been happening lately. i m caught up with other things & my home ends up in a big big mess... to the point i cant find the remote control to my DVD player -> that shows i havent watched dvd for quite awhile.


deeper... i think it's a reflection of my state of mind. of late, i seem to be having lots to think about yet i dunno what is it that bothers me. probably i know but unconciously trying to run away. i dunno. i can b quite elusive in that sense... maybe i m just a coward who's scared to face the realities in life. sometimes i think "just let me live in my fantasy"

u say i could have cleaned it up last Merdeka weekend, when i didnt have to work for 3 days. but the pig in me won my time - i managed to hibernate & slept my hoildays away! not the whole time of course, i spent great quality time, with my family & taking my nieces out to 1U.

i think i will go home early tonite & get an early start tomorrow morning. oh, wait... i need to be my mum's personal chaffeur, taking her around town to run her errands before her cataract op next week. sunday...maybe. but i dont want to tire myself out as monday is a working day.

excuses!

ok, i admit it - i m lazy. sigh.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

must show my true colours!

while randomly surfing, i came across this site - Colorgenics - which supposingly can tell us our characteristics through our choice of colour selection.

the resulting analysis of me:


Name: ch3ryl
Date: 9/4/2008
Colorgenics Number: 21340756
You are a very sensitive person and you try hard (perhaps a little too hard) to make favourable impressions and to be recognised by your peers. But you have that inherent need to feel appreciated and admired and you are easily hurt if all of your endeavours go by unappreciated or not acknowledged. Stop trying so hard.

You are a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. You need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan you tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.
You are feeling under considerable pressure and you are being forced to make concessions. You are not particularly happy with this state of affairs but you feel that you have no alternative. If you were to force issues you would be left out or completely ignored by one and all.
Whatever has caused the situation, you just don't seem to be able to sustain or maintain relationships as you would wish to. What you really seek is to be able to develop a relationship with someone with whom you can truly share: Love, Serenity, Peace and Quiet. But you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord: you are like the tide, flotsam and jetsam... One minute you experience 'highs' and a few moments later 'lows'. This obviously will introduce discord into any relationship and with this demanding attitude - the ideal state you desire is unable to develop. Despite the urge to gratify your natural desires, you impose a considerable self-restraint on your instincts in the belief that this demonstrates your superiority and raises you above the common herd. You are extremely critical of everything that is presently going on around you and you find it difficult to listen to or to take advice from anyone. You enjoy the original, the ingenious and the subtle.
You need to be respected as an exceptional individual. This is the only way that you can hope to achieve the status that you wish to achieve. You set yourself very high standards - and come what may - you abide by them.


my analysis on the above analysis - hmmm... pretty accurate. i'd give it a 85. that's pretty high. the 15 point reduction was for this statement - you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord- which i dun agree. i dun think i am a demanding person - i think i m simple & rather cin-cai.... in most circumstances. ha! & i think i m only critical with certain things and/or certain people. otherwise i couldnt care less. if i m critical, i think it's because i care. no? and i don't think i m an extrovert - but i do like to be in control, though. other than that - i pretty agree with what was 'written' about me.

try it for yourself and let me know what you think.

我做错了吗?

我做错了吗? 那惊天动地过后又一觉大睡的经历真的那么令我绞架不了吗?既然那么的惊天动地, 为何我会有点愧疚?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

真心相识为何不能一世相知?

呢两年来,感情生活过得有D平淡,有D复杂,有D多姿多彩,也有D无奈。。。身边的追求者唔会少之无数,但係感觉上始终未遇到对的对象。究竟有无对的对象?


可能因为前一段感情带俾我嘅伤害太大。。。所以要时时提醒自己唔好轻举妄动,不要咁容易动情。依家,我嘅心再次被打动, 但实际上我本人係好容易心动。。。我该如何?


不要随便牵手,更不要随便放手


P/S: 可能对你来讲呢篇嘢无乜make sense。。。亦都因为我心里都有D乱。 很想好好关心同爱护一个人,同样地亦都想好好地被关心同爱护。

后记: 寻晚所写嘅。。。到依家都有D念念不忘。仲係思考紧寻晚点解有咁嘅冲动写左以上呢篇混乱。 都怪我唔知点样突然被一句话深深地带来一份感触: 不要随便牵手,更不要随便放手。 似付我有D越描越黑。 @-@ (3 Sept 2008, 10.56am)