Tuesday, December 30, 2008

what do you see?

Do you see a storm approaching? Or do you see clear skies post-storm?

(Pic taken from my balcony, 28 Dec 2008 3.24pm)

The day after tomorrow - we are officially bidding the Year of 2008 farewell - I am wondering - what's in store for me in the year to come? Whatever it is, I am sure it will be a challenging year, a great year!!!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

have a wonderful christmas...and a great 2009!

sweet is the taste of revenge...

...sweeter still the taste of forgiveness.

'Tis more noble to forgive, and more manly to despise, than to revenge an injury. - Benjamin Franklin

i had been having this controversial thought in my mind for the last 2 years. should i rejoice when i see a fella who had hurt me and caused me much injustice one day suffer? i could have taken revenge easily, but i chose not to... cause i have always believed that 天有眼... and therefore, i left it to the One to take avenge for me. well, the world would say it's only fair we repay kindness with kindness, cruelty with cruelty. yeah, an eye for an eye - will make the world goes blind.

well... living a super luxurious life, going for holidays half way round the globe and all - are all mere superficial stuffs as i had guessed. thankfully, this person is my history. and because i know him so well, i know somehow, he will fall. not because he is a failure, but because he has failed to see beyond his own hypocrisy and pretentious lifestyle.

tell me - what good is it if you live an empty life? when your mortgages are overdue and banks are calling you every other day? when your car has been towed by the bank? when you are blacklisted by all banks? when you have lost the one you loved, for the one you lusted? when you have caused grief and sadness in your family? when you have lost the respect from your younger siblings? trade all these with a life filled with alcohol, women, travel and gambling??? how silly...

i m not a very noble person. now at this point, all i can say is that the taste of revenge is not sweet. it's just a comfort and encouragement to know i have not 'suffered' in vain, and that there's still 天理, justice. 人善天不欺, 簡單一個道理

i do hope still, one day, he'd come to his senses and change his way...before he loses everything, including his family, his friend, or even his life.

Monday, December 15, 2008

i have got the answer to my last post

it's ...

yes, it's a green light - which means 'GO'. cool :)
slowly and steadily but surely. i don't have to run very fast, it's not a race, i could do it at my own pace. i can still take time to stop and smell the flowers yet i will still soar and reach for the stars.
"Flowers do not force their way with great strife. Flowers open to perfection slowly in the sun."
你說的對, 最難過的2年,我都撐得住 - 區區幾個月又有什么問題呢?

Friday, December 5, 2008

at the traffic light

stop, wait or go?

Friday, November 14, 2008

life is like this...

A leaf that is destined to grow large is full of grooves and wrinkles at the start. Now if one has no patience and wants it smooth offhand like a willow leaf, there is trouble ahead.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

手放開 letting go

the hardest part is still letting go. when i thought i have let go... current circumstances remind me that i had not FULLY let go.


it's kinda tempting to take revenge. revenge is so easily attainable. however, my conscience stopped me. for all the hurts that had been caused to me, i could easily justify my vengeance. i believe that somehow, someday, you will see it coming back to you. it will haunt you. and that is the greatest revenge, no?

it kills me at times and drives me crazy knowing that you are living such a 'happy' life. yea... happy on the outside, but empty on the inside. nobody out there knows what's going on in your private life. but i do know. and because i know, i take delight. and also because i know, i smirked at your so-called happy mask. i sneered at the fact of how much you are of a hypocrite.

i can still remember clearly on one incident - my words to you were these, "you will owe for the rest of your life." and yes, you will. no, it's not only about the financials. it's more than that. and you know it.

why am i still bothered about all these? have i not cut you out from my life? i thought i have let go fully... but i guess, i may not. not when i still am struggling here, trying to clean up the shit you left behind while looking at you going on with life as if nothing has gone wrong. someday i will be able to live my life again, the way i want it, and not bound and haunted by the things you did. someday, i will... and when that day comes, i am confident then i would have fully let go.

letting go comes from the heart... 真正的放開是打從心里啟動的

Thursday, November 6, 2008

婚姻如一碗水 it's like a bowl of water


Marriage is like two people holding a bowl of water... as they walk together, some are left with the bowl still almost full, some had little left, some an empty bowl...and some with broken bowls.

Friday, October 24, 2008



Thursday, October 23, 2008

Facebook residents - Your chance to do good!

if you have a big heart but a shallow pocket - this is for you.
if you have wanted to help mankind, but have no time - this is for you.
if you just wanted to give back to society and dunno where to begin - this is for you.

fancy sitting right there, with a few taps on the keyboard and a few clicks on the mouse and TA-DAAAA u have helped one of these organisations get a donation of $50,000? no, this is NOT spamming. and u dont even have to give a cent.

read on.

The Western Union Foundation was created to help individuals, families and communities worldwide. The Foundation supports charitable giving programs, education and human services programs and humanitarian projects and relief efforts.

NOW there’s more work to be done, more charities to support, more money to send. Help them choose the charity to get $50,000.

the charitable orgainisations in the list are as follows:

1) CARE - Empowering women in the fight against poverty.

2) Accion USA - Transforming lives with microloans

3) Room to Read - Providing 200 years of girls education in the developing world.

4) Opportunity International - Microfinance. End poverty in Kenya now.

5) American Red Cross - Preventing, preparing for and responding to emergencies.

6) UNICEF - Whatever it takes to save a child.

7) World Vision - Building a better world for children.

all you need to do is go to “Facebook-Our World Gives”- and cast your vote. you have got one life - do something, do it now!

DO it, please...you have got nothing to lose.

Friday, October 17, 2008










Tuesday, October 14, 2008

happy birthday to me!

给亲爱的自己: 生日快乐 !

昨晚的我好迟训。。。为了等他的一通电话。 之前佢讲唔会打俾我,因为怕太夜,叫我先训。但係我话我会等。 结果放工到家都已经9点多。。。睇下电视,发下白日梦,唔惊唔觉就已经凌晨1点多。依然无乜睡意,但係觉得再唔训,怕今日训唔醒。
刚爬上床,电话就响起。係佢!!! 虽然係短短的几分钟,心里却很甜。 :)
已经半年无与佢见面,心里那份牵挂很难形容。 短短的一通电话足以让我带笑入睡。仿佛好似佢就係我身边,抱住一样。 唔知何时何日可以让呢果情景变为现实。
my birthday this year is much more happier than the last. even though last year - i celebrated it with a vacation, whilst i m slogging like a dog now, my heart is so much lighter. and because of that i am happy.
happiness could be so temporal, but true joy always spring from within. we could be enjoying ourselves with multitudes around us, but whether the feeling or the emotions stay - that's another matter.
just a phone call from a special someone could make me smile as i go to sleep. the few minutes brought hours, possibly days of warmth in the heart. :) hmmmm... i seem to be still on a 'high' that i couldnt really describe the special effect that phone call had on me.
just side track a little - as i was getting out of the house this morning to go to work, someone left two teddy bears at my door. sweet? the gesture - yes, but the giver isnt really someone on my good list. i know i sound ungrateful. actually the teddies were from my ex. it was a promise made by him, years ago - that to every country he flies to, he will bring back a teddy for me. when i saw the teddies, i felt neither happy nor sad. i just shrugged it off and rushed off to work. in my heart, i just felt that if he was one who had kept his promises back then, we could have still be together to this day. so what's the point of keeping the promises now?
good thing was that it didnt dampen my moods or anything. in fact, i feel i couldnt care less. well, at least he didnt go crazy and throw poisonous snakes at my door, right?
well... i m glad to say that i have returned the teddies to him. i just put them back at his door. he's actually staying next door ... i m just glad that i did that.
so...note to self:
happy birthday. have a blast, live a great life - coz you deserve one. do not let unworthy things or people distract you of your goals and dreams. remember, being happy is a choice. do what you need to do. live life the best you can.
(please dont say i m a self-obsessed 自恋狂 - i believe we need to be able to accept and love ourselves, before we can expect others to accept and love us)

Thursday, October 9, 2008

yummy evening that ended with rashes scare

Raspberry Chocolate Latte


last evening was great, finally get to meet up with a super good friend... havent seen her for at least half a year. food was nothing to shout about, the raspberry choc latte kept me awake...no, it made me crave for more :)

as we were sitting there, chatting and catching up... she noticed that there are rashes on my hands. it's kinda itchy, something like 风模. i didn't know what caused the rashes, hope it's not the drink coz i do plan to go and get another one to satisfy my craving. probably it's the food. coz another friend who was there with us commented that she sometimes get allergic reactions, after taking vegetarian food. well, i m not sure, coz this is not the first time i ate vegetarian food, and i have been to this place before, albeit quite a few years back.

after saying our bye byes, i decided to pop by the panel clinic on the way home. i dont want the rashes to flare up the next day. i had one bad experience with rashes, that forced me to take MC and stay home for 3 days, as the rashes will resurface when i m in air-conditioned and super cool room like the office. and it's not just the arms and legs, or the body, it even decided to pay a visit to my face. i dont want to risk looking like a monkey again, lol.

the doc gave me a jab, a bottle of calamine lotion with antibiotics and some anti-itch tablets... and i went home happily, still thinking abt the yummy raspberry choc latte. :)

thank goodness, my skin is clear now (touch wood!) ...

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Lousy Cupid

(picture courtesy of bitter stickgirl)

isn't that how we feel sometimes? what's cupid doing? or rather what's cupid doing wrong?

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

is it love? or is it a just an assumption?

when you feel that he doesnt care much about you, maybe it's because you cared too much.


sometimes, love is just an assumption.


from the very beginning, you have already assumed that he loved you.


because of this belief, you have decided to give it your all. just like spring cleaning of the heart, you clear it all to give it to him. all because you believe that he loved you and therefore, he loved all that you are.


do you really know what you like about him? is it just a feeling of comfort? or care? or fear of loneliness? or just to prove that you are no longer alone? do you really know what love is? sometimes, love could just be an assumption, it's just what you assumed it to be.


Monday, September 22, 2008



新闻报道: 国际权威检测机构:大白兔奶糖不含甲醛。 係真唔係啊?不过呢排,中国有毒牛奶事件实在太惊人啦。。。


算啦,唔吃都吃了咁多年咯。。。唯有从今日起,唔再吃大白兔奶糖。 等等,雪柜好似仲有半包。

white rabbit milk candy - one of the few candies snack that i take had just been declared as one of the confectionery products banned by the Malaysian government. i shudder to think (and dare not imagine) that i have been taking (and enjoying!) melamine all these years... and as of now, i still have half a pack of these candies in my fridge. :(

Thursday, September 18, 2008

my late dad was a taxi driver, too!

Malaysian taxis voted as the worst in the world! not surprising, if you ask me...but definitely disappointing. what a shame!

full story can be found here. just an excerpt of the article:
The ads promoting "Malaysia: Truly Asia" aim to welcome visitors with a warm smile to a prosperous and modern nation, so the taxi fleet branded "the worst in the world" can come as a bit of a shock.
Even the locals are not spared the shabby service of unkempt and hostile drivers behind the wheels of decrepit vehicles who refuse to use the meter, overcharge and pick-and-choose which destinations they will travel to.
why does this make me sad? first & foremost becoz i m a malaysian. it's terrible and embarrassing to be voted the worst in the world.

above all that, becoz my late dad was a taxi driver himself for over 20 years. every time when i board a taxi - i will chat with the drivers. talking to them somehow makes me feel i m connected to my dad, who left us 7 years ago.

it's tough life being a taxi driver. try driving around all day under the hot scorching sun, getting stuck in jams, having irregular meal times, having to control your about-to-burst bladder. on and on... i still remember there were at least twice when dad came home with his face and shirt stained with blood! yup, we now drive around feeling so paranoid, thinking about those new crime tactics that we just read from our emails or the news. you know, those where potential crimes take place if someone hit your car or knocked on your window. think of the risk and fear that these taxi drivers had to encounter, when they had to take in passengers. to make a living for themselves and their loved ones, they had no choice but to take these passengers. yes, they can reject the suspicious ones, but what if they are genuine and they decide to report to the authorities the cabby who declined their business?

well... i don't deny that there are black sheep amongst the pack. i have met some rather rude or unfriendly taxi drivers before. and there were some who made me wanna jump out the taxi as soon as i got on, coz they look so kidnapperish/robberish. and then there were some who had 'upgraded' their meters to run faster, as if to catch up with the fast-paced lives of these days.

i just plead that before we point our fingers at ALL the taxi drivers, let us also be considerate and put ourselves in their shoes.
together, hand in hand, may the dreams of our Malaysian taxi drivers and all Malaysians come true...

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

i see green

recently discovered a green project by canon - check my photo contributions...

go check it out at http://www.canongoesgreen.com/ - nice jingle as you browse through. can a person makes a difference? can a simple gesture makes a greener world? yes and yes!

here's what you can do:
1. They need 300 volunteers to help them plant 2,500 tree saplings.
2. If you can't make it for the tree planting - just submit a photo. You won't even need to leave your desk, or take your eyes off the PC/laptop screen.
Just do it, will ya...

Monday, September 15, 2008

accidental love

Extract from the article:

GEORGE TOWN: Unlike many couples who met under normal circumstances, Eddie Yeoh, 33, and Eunice Tan, 26, literally collided with each other in a road accident two years ago.

Yeoh’s car rammed into the back of Eunice’s car at Gambir Heights near their work place here on that day in 2006.

He said they were working in the same company but did not really know each other until the accident.

“Fortunately no one was injured in the incident. Everything is fated. Since her car had to be sent for repairs after the accident, I had to fetch her to work every day and that’s how our story started,” he said.

this is a good story of how every cloud is silver-lined. there's always sunshine after a thunderstorm... but perhaps for us to appreciate the sunshine more, we had to go through the thunderstorm first.
about love - is it accidental or is it a coincidence or is it fated to be so?

Saturday, September 13, 2008

how i wish i wake up to this every morning...

beautiful blue skies, big white fluffy clouds

蓝天白云 - 蓝的极致,白的纯洁 - 正! 人生一大快事!

even the nite sky was pretty lately... guess it's due to the mid-autumn festival that the Chinese will be celebrating tomorrow. 明月一闪一闪,挂天边; 思念一丝一丝;连成线。

Thursday, September 11, 2008



张敬轩 - 酩酊天使

曲:蔡志浩/ Vincent Chow@Sense


编曲: Gary Tong

监制: Alvin Leong




































Wednesday, September 10, 2008

the extremes of life ... or is that the norm?

a friend told me a good news - he finally found someone new. i was truly happy for him, coz i think he is a great guy. and he has been single for quite some time now.
barely half an hour later, i was informed by another friend, he just broke up with his girlfriend. i think he's a great guy too & i feel sad for him as well.

life's extremes - just as new love is found, another heart is broken somewhere else. or is that the norms of life?

there's more - when a new life is a born, another may be taken away. just as a teardrop falls, a smile has been carved elsewhere. as we are bidding our farewell, a new friend has been made over there. 有人欢笑,有人愁。

to my two friends above - i sincerely wish them happiness.

a day in the hospital

9 Sept 2008
took a day off work yesterday ... to read on a hospital bed.

in fact i took a nap, watched the TV & had my breakfast, lunch, tea break & dinner on there as well. i was in the hospital from 6am to 7pm... fortunately, i didnt have to spend the night.

i was actually waiting for my mother - who was admitted as a day-care patient in the ophtamalogy ward of HKL. she had her cataract surgery. she's fine now, and resting at home.

mum, moments before she's being brought to the operating theatre

the furthest i could go with her - no stepping beyond the red line!

people who knew about me taking a day off to accompany my mum yesterday had the following remarks:

"wow, such a good daughter." "that's so filial of you." etc etc

my response: not really. as i looked at my mum's frail silhoutte (she seems to have lost lots of weight over the years) and her sometimes helplessness (helpless does not equal to hopeless or useless, ok?) - i felt bad & a tinge of guilt overwhelmed me. i realised i had not been a good daughter after all, as some would have assumed. tho' i wasnt the naughtiest kid on the block, i did made her angry & had to beat me up countless times when i was young. in her words yesterday - 打你都是因为要教你 (to beat you is to teach you). mum was a firm believer of sparing the rod, spoiling the child.

even in my adult life, i have caused her lots of heartaches... & i don't know how many more times i broke her heart. i wish... i could make it up to her someway, somehow, someday.

just taking a day off work, and spending it with her is nothing - compared to the sacrifices she had made and how she had taken care of me when i was young. she may have more than 1 child, but i only have 1 mother. there were & are & will still be times when we cant see eye to eye - but at least, we can feel heart to heart.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts

i read & copied this article from here. reason i m posting it in my blog is to keep it as a point of reference for myself.


First off, there are those who are reading this who might not know which camp they fall into, the extrovert or the introvert. Chances are, the majority of those reading this will know, but for those who don’t, let’s define those two terms here very broadly.

Extroverts tend to be those who are more energized when around other people. They are the ones who will reach for the cell phone when alone for more than a minute, the ones who love to go out every weekend, the ones who love to chit chat, mingle, and socialize.

Introverts tend to be those who are more energized when alone with themselves. They are the ones who have to be dragged to parties, who are the first ones ready to leave after a short period of time, and who generally enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming. (yes - this is basically how i am)

The qualities and characteristics of introverts are often held in a negative light in today’s world, so it’s only natural that the majority of people seem to think that there’s something wrong with them.

The reason why the majority of people think that there’s something wrong with introverts is because the majority of people aren’t very knowledgeable when it comes to introverts, in terms of why they are the way they are and why they do the things they do.

Many people tend to hold several potentially damaging misconceptions about introverts, but through no fault of their own.

I’ve been on both sides of the extrovert/introvert fence, and I can understand why extroverts tend to view introverts in a negative light, socially speaking, so I thought it would be best to write an article dedicated to helping extroverts understand their often very misunderstood introvert counterparts.

My hope is this article will help solve that problem by shedding some light as to why introverts are the way they are and do the things they do, so here are 5 things every extrovert should know about introverts.

1. If a person is introverted, it does NOT mean they are shy or anti-social.
This is probably THE biggest misconception that extroverts tend to have when it comes to introverts.

And you can’t really blame them for having that kind of misconception.

Extroverts tend to have to drag introverts to parties, to convince them to go and sell them on attending social engagements. When introverts politely decline, extroverts automatically assume that something might be wrong so they always ask if everything’s all right (yes - this almost always happens! sigh...) and of course, everything is all right. It’s just a common misunderstanding. When extroverts see a pattern like this developing, they automatically assume that introverts are shy or anti-social as that can be the only logical explanation to them.

What’s more, when extroverts try to engage introverts in small talk, it seems like they hit a brick wall.

Add to that, most extroverts see that introverts tend to be fond of engaging in solitary activities such as reading, writing, and daydreaming.

Well, if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it must be a duck right?


Introverts have more brain activity in their frontal lobes and when these areas are activated through solitary activity, introverts become energized through processes such as problem solving, introspection, and complex thinking.

Extroverts on the other hand tend to have more activity in the back of their brain, areas that deal with processing sensory information from the external world, so they tend to search for external stimuli in the form of interacting with other people and the outside world to energize them.

There’s a deeper science to this that involves differences in the levels of brain chemicals such as acetylcholine and dopamine in extroverts and introverts, but I won’t get into that.

The bottom line is that introverts are just wired differently than extroverts. There’s nothing “wrong” with them. They just become energized through different processes depending on where the majority of their brain activity takes place.

Granted there are introverts who may be shy and anti-social, but that’s just a coincidence that perpetuates the myth that ALL introverts are like that.

You’ll find that all introverts are fine just the way they are until people begin to subtly suggest otherwise.

2. Introverts tend to dislike small talk.
If you really want to engage an introvert in conversation, skip the small talk. Introverts tend to love deep conversations on subjects that interest them. They love to debate, go past the superficial and poke around the depths in people’s minds to see what’s really going on in there. Most, if not all introverts tend to regard small talk as a waste of time, unless it’s with someone new they just met. (oooh, perfect description!)

This characteristic probably contributes to another misconception that extroverts have of introverts - the misconception that all introverts are arrogant.


Because extroverts notice that introverts don’t talk that much with other people. Therefore, extroverts assume that introverts think they’re too good to talk to others, hence arrogant and that’s hardly the case.

It’s just a matter of preference.

Extroverts thrive on small talk.Introverts abhor it.

There’s nothing wrong with either choice, it’s just a matter of preference.

This brings us to the third point.

3. Introverts do like to socialize – only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.
Yes, it’s true. Contrary to the majority of public opinion, introverts do like to socialize, but again, only in a different manner and less frequently than extroverts.

Introverts love anything that involves deep conversation. They get energized by discussing subjects that are important to them and they love see what and how other people think, to connect the dots, to dig deep, to find root causes, to use logical thinking via debate in conversation, etc.

And what’s more, introverts can do a lot of things extroverts are naturally good at - give great speeches, schmooze with everyone, be the life of the party, charm the socks off of total strangers - but only for a short period of time. After that, they need time for themselves which brings us to the fourth point.

4. Introverts need time alone to recharge. (yes, i am one who needs lots of me-time)
Extroverts tend to think introverts have something against them as they constantly seem to refuse generous invites to social engagements. Introverts do appreciate the offers, but it’s just that they know it will take a lot of energy out of them if they pursue these social functions.

They need time alone like they need food and water. Give them their space. There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re not depressed and they’re not sad. They just need time alone to recharge their batteries.

5. Introverts are socially well adjusted.
Most introverts are well aware of all the social nuances, customs, and mannerisms when it comes to interacting with other people, but they simply don’t choose to socialize as much as extroverts, which makes it easy for extroverts to assume that introverts are not socially well adjusted, as they have not seen much evidence of them interacting with other people.

This just exacerbates previous misconceptions and gives way to labeling introverts as nerds, geeks, loners, etc.

It’s easy to understand why society tends to value extroverts over introverts. Human beings have lived in a tribal society so having to interact frequently with people came to be a regarded as a very good skill when it came to survival.

But because of this high value placed on extroversion, introverts tend to feel trapped and find themselves in a catch 22 situation.

Do introverts stay true to who they are and risk social alienation and isolation or do introverts conform and join the extroverted side, pretending to be somebody they’re not just to fit in?

This is precisely why I wrote this article, because if the extroverts can become more educated about introverts, introverts will be able to feel free to stay true to who they are, and that’s a good thing from society’s point of view.

Trying to “turn” an introverted person into an extroverted person is detrimental because it gives off a subtle suggestion that there is something wrong with them, hampering their self worth and esteem when there is absolutely nothing wrong in the first place.

There’s nothing wrong with introverts.

In fact, introverts are the leading pioneers of advancements in human civilization. Albert Einstein, Issac Newton, Charles Darwin are a few introverts that come to mind, just to name a few.

And for those of you not interested in science, but pop culture, you’ll be surprised to see a lot of well known names in Hollywood are introverts as well. Julia Roberts, Steven Spielberg, Christian Bale to name a few as well.

And for those interested in sports, Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods come to mind as athletes who are introverts as well.

Introverts have a lot to bring to the table. They have an amazing ability to discover new thoughts, an uncanny ability to focus, to concentrate, to connect the dots, to observe and note things that most people miss, to listen extremely well and are often found having a rich and vivid imagination too. (great!)

The more extroverts become knowledgeable about introverts, the less tension and misunderstanding there will be among the two.

So if you’re an introvert reading this, send a copy of this article to all your extrovert friends so they can get a better idea of what you’re all about.

It’s time to finally clear the air.


this article surely lifted me up. for those who know me personally, please stop assuming that i m arrogant, snobbish or anti-social ya! :)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

it's 6 sept...

i realised this date which changed my life had become less and less significant. i didnt even realise it's 6 sept today...until a while ago.

5 years ago on this day... i began a journey in life, expecting a fairy tale ending - happily ever after. 有一个时期, 我以为我会永远记得这一天; 没想到现在这一天却变了只是普普通通的一天, 并没什么特别。

it didnt happen. that dream was shattered two years on. finally, my life took a detour last July. looking back sometimes, it still seems like i have been in a dream these 5 years. 梦已经破碎了。。。往后的日子,我只有带着盼望和希望继续好好的活, 寻找自己的幸福。 我会再次得到幸福吗? 我希望会。。。请祝福我。

Friday, September 5, 2008

cluttered mind, cluttered heart, cluttered home

just the other day, a friend decided to drop by at my place ... unannounced!

oops, my home is a mess.

(nope, my house is not as dirty as above, it's just messy)

embarassing! i m resolving to clear the clutter & give the house a spanking clean & tidy look this weekend... if i dont get caught up by other things. i hope i wont be caught with a messy home again!

that's what has been happening lately. i m caught up with other things & my home ends up in a big big mess... to the point i cant find the remote control to my DVD player -> that shows i havent watched dvd for quite awhile.

deeper... i think it's a reflection of my state of mind. of late, i seem to be having lots to think about yet i dunno what is it that bothers me. probably i know but unconciously trying to run away. i dunno. i can b quite elusive in that sense... maybe i m just a coward who's scared to face the realities in life. sometimes i think "just let me live in my fantasy"

u say i could have cleaned it up last Merdeka weekend, when i didnt have to work for 3 days. but the pig in me won my time - i managed to hibernate & slept my hoildays away! not the whole time of course, i spent great quality time, with my family & taking my nieces out to 1U.

i think i will go home early tonite & get an early start tomorrow morning. oh, wait... i need to be my mum's personal chaffeur, taking her around town to run her errands before her cataract op next week. sunday...maybe. but i dont want to tire myself out as monday is a working day.


ok, i admit it - i m lazy. sigh.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

must show my true colours!

while randomly surfing, i came across this site - Colorgenics - which supposingly can tell us our characteristics through our choice of colour selection.

the resulting analysis of me:

Name: ch3ryl
Date: 9/4/2008
Colorgenics Number: 21340756
You are a very sensitive person and you try hard (perhaps a little too hard) to make favourable impressions and to be recognised by your peers. But you have that inherent need to feel appreciated and admired and you are easily hurt if all of your endeavours go by unappreciated or not acknowledged. Stop trying so hard.

You are a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. You need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan you tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.
You are feeling under considerable pressure and you are being forced to make concessions. You are not particularly happy with this state of affairs but you feel that you have no alternative. If you were to force issues you would be left out or completely ignored by one and all.
Whatever has caused the situation, you just don't seem to be able to sustain or maintain relationships as you would wish to. What you really seek is to be able to develop a relationship with someone with whom you can truly share: Love, Serenity, Peace and Quiet. But you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord: you are like the tide, flotsam and jetsam... One minute you experience 'highs' and a few moments later 'lows'. This obviously will introduce discord into any relationship and with this demanding attitude - the ideal state you desire is unable to develop. Despite the urge to gratify your natural desires, you impose a considerable self-restraint on your instincts in the belief that this demonstrates your superiority and raises you above the common herd. You are extremely critical of everything that is presently going on around you and you find it difficult to listen to or to take advice from anyone. You enjoy the original, the ingenious and the subtle.
You need to be respected as an exceptional individual. This is the only way that you can hope to achieve the status that you wish to achieve. You set yourself very high standards - and come what may - you abide by them.

my analysis on the above analysis - hmmm... pretty accurate. i'd give it a 85. that's pretty high. the 15 point reduction was for this statement - you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord- which i dun agree. i dun think i am a demanding person - i think i m simple & rather cin-cai.... in most circumstances. ha! & i think i m only critical with certain things and/or certain people. otherwise i couldnt care less. if i m critical, i think it's because i care. no? and i don't think i m an extrovert - but i do like to be in control, though. other than that - i pretty agree with what was 'written' about me.

try it for yourself and let me know what you think.


我做错了吗? 那惊天动地过后又一觉大睡的经历真的那么令我绞架不了吗?既然那么的惊天动地, 为何我会有点愧疚?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008



可能因为前一段感情带俾我嘅伤害太大。。。所以要时时提醒自己唔好轻举妄动,不要咁容易动情。依家,我嘅心再次被打动, 但实际上我本人係好容易心动。。。我该如何?


P/S: 可能对你来讲呢篇嘢无乜make sense。。。亦都因为我心里都有D乱。 很想好好关心同爱护一个人,同样地亦都想好好地被关心同爱护。

后记: 寻晚所写嘅。。。到依家都有D念念不忘。仲係思考紧寻晚点解有咁嘅冲动写左以上呢篇混乱。 都怪我唔知点样突然被一句话深深地带来一份感触: 不要随便牵手,更不要随便放手。 似付我有D越描越黑。 @-@ (3 Sept 2008, 10.56am)

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

a decision that i will never regret...

...and these few days undergoing the SAP Consol (Accounts) training reaffirms that decision i made more than 10 years ago in 1996.

when i applied for college back then - i applied to take up a major in Management Accounting. the other close competitor is a major in Financial Accounting. those of you not in the field will just say - what's the big deal? both the majors still have the word "accounting" in there. true, but the similarities end there.

briefly -
Financial Accounting : deals mainly with the reporting of past data - the history
Management Accounting : deals with future, probable-to-happen data - the future

i m so glad i took MA back then. i just feel that i m not cut out to be an accountant. i m better off analysing, writing commentaries, fiddling with possible scenarios, playing with forecasts figures, predicting trends ... those tasks make me more alive.

many people have commented to me, in front of me, by the side of me, behind me --> accountants are boring. well, u cant really blame them - they are dealing with dead, historical data most times. but don't underestimate them - ever heard of creative accounting?

last but not least - i m proud to say that i m a member of the Chartered Institute of Management Accountants (yes, showing off i am just because i can! haha.)

Thursday, August 21, 2008


城市充满短暂的烟火 - 照亮了沉默,带出了寂寞


可能我只想知道你在想什么, 请贴近我的心, 贴近我的耳朵。

Phuket Fantasy Part 3/3

it's been at least a week since my last post. i have forgotten most of what i wanna write in this last episode of the phuket fantasy. my mind has been invaded this week with all sorts of things at work - i was in an advanced excel workshop for the first 2 days of the work week, and these 3 days (incl. tomorrow) i m in a state of confusion most of the time in the world of SAP. i shall try my best to capture the essence of the last 2 days of the fantasy before pushing & forcing myself to face the real world.

Day 3 - marked the day we checked out of Karon Princess and moved to Kata Palm Resort. it was love at first sight ... well, almost... the hotel was having some minor renovation work going on. but still, the place was beautiful. impressive lobby. and the room! it's very romantic. we did not have sea-view, but the pool view was great too.

my room mate couldnt wait to jump into the pool, while i couldnt wait to soak in the tub :) while some others just wanted to laze around.

we had some rest & relax time, before proceeding to Phuket Fantasea; phuket island's renowned theme park. a few friends who had been to phuket said this is a must-see. so we forked out slightly less than MYR150 to go, which is inclusive of a show.

the show won a lot of applause. spectacular to say the least. too bad we were not allowed to bring in our cameras... inclusive of our camera handphones. it's a good thing though, otherwise we will be too busy snapping away & did not concentrate on the show.

the show starts at 9pm, but u should go earlier to do some shopping, & explore the other attractions there - the palace of the elephants, festival village, elephant rides; to name a few.

by the time we leave the park we were exhausted & excited. our exhaustion won over and we decided to go back to the hotel. nearing Kata beach, we went for a stroll, jalan-jalan cari makan. our last chance to savour the delicous food, before we leave the next morning.

by the time we were back in our hotel room, i was very tired. just tried to gather my last bit of strength to pack my bags before going to bed.

Day 4 - we had time after breakfast, to go for massage, swim, shopping and whatever we wanted to do before we leave for the airport. i took a stroll along Kata beach. the sea was still pretty rough. the waves were as high as a kid. kinda scary, if u ask me.

i finally managed to buy a pair of sandals. i have always wanted a pair, but nothing caught my fancy. practiced my negotiation skills :) what to do, THB in my pocket was almost depleted.

at the airport, we had a quick lunch at Burger King before boarding our flight home. sad... to leave such a beautiful place. sad... to see our holiday end. sad ... knowing we had to go back to work the next day.

so that's about it. am looking forward to my next holiday. no idea when and where yet. maybe a trip to Yogyakarta to see this?